An Innocent Abroad

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What?’ Amy asked, a defiant sparkle in her eye.

‘Nothing. I was shocked that’s all’ I replied.

‘Don’t you think I’m entitled to a bit of fun?’ she challenged.

‘You can do what you like. You must admit though, that it’s a bit of a shock when you walk in on someone doing it. Even more so when you’re old enough to be his mother.’

She glared at me and turned dramatically on her heel, leaving me alone in the kitchen. Her kitchen. In the villa where I was a guest. Her guest. It was her villa to do as she pleased and she most certainly had been doing that when I came back a little earlier than I’d planned. With the young man who cleaned the pool. How clichéd could you get? I got some wine from the fridge so that I could think. She was a grown woman, divorced in all but name, who’d invited me to stay in a bid to jolt me out of a fugue that I just hadn’t seemed to be able to climb out of since Jim decided that he preferred his meat a little more tender than 46 years old. About half as old, in fact. Amy and I had known each other for years, had been on many a night out as a foursome, had swapped bawdy stories, but I’d never seen her in the throes of passion before and had reacted a little more than I’d have thought of myself.

It wasn’t so much that she’d felt the urge for a little afternoon relaxation, it was more the fact that she’d done it alfresco, by the pool, with a teenager. The villa was off the beaten track, but it was by no means isolated and she could be seen or even overheard from the other couple of villas in the community. I drained my glass, becoming more and more annoyed at myself for my reaction. My thoughts turned to home. I couldn’t stay. Not now. I wasn’t sure when there’d be a flight home, but I’d go to a hotel while I sorted something out. I went down the corridor to my room, the sound of the shower coming from the partly-open bathroom door.

I paused for a moment and then got out my suitcase, opening drawers and scooping the contents unceremoniously into the yawning case. I’d almost finished when I sensed a presence in the room. I turned, to see Amy standing in her robe, towelling her hair.

‘What are you doing?’ she asked.

I gave her a look that said “do you really need to ask?”

I’ll save you the detail of our little fight, but in a few minutes, we were sitting in the kitchen, an uneasy truce declared. She’d persuaded me to give her another chance, supported by my desire to be in the sun rather than moping around at home in the rain and wind. I looked at my half empty wine glass, wondering whether I should just leave after all.

‘You know, you should just let yourself go. Enjoy yourself while you’re here. Forget about who you are at home. Nobody knows you here. Just do

whatever you want’ she said.

‘It’s okay for you, it’s your house. I can’t just pretend that I’m here on my own and no-one will know, can I?’

‘Let’s put it like this: am I going to go home and tell all and sundry that I screwed the pool boy? Probably not. Why? Because no-one would give a shit. Would I go home and tell everyone that prim and proper Mary screwed the pool boy? No. Why?’

‘Because I haven’t and I wouldn’t’ I said, before realising how judgemental it sounded. ‘I mean…’ I started to clarify.

‘I know what you mean’ she replied. ‘Anyway, I suggested it and he said no.’

I looked at her dumbstruck. ‘You asked him about me?’

‘We were talking, you know, as you do. I asked him whether he would, given the chance. He said no.’

‘I’m not sure whether to be offended or relieved’ I replied.

I saw her smile. ‘It wasn’t an outright refusal’ she teased. I looked at her, silently urging her to give me the sordid details.

‘He said he would if you had shorter hair, but he’d probably pass as you are at present.’

‘Cheeky bastard. And you’re not much better for talking about me like that. Anyway, what’s wrong with my hair?’ I asked, a hand going to my head defensively. I’d had quite an expensive cut before coming out here, even if the guy hadn’t taken much off the length. It was a blonde bob when I went in and was a blonde bob when I came out, it was just that his skill with the scissors was superb. He’d sharpened up the line and I was really pleased with the way that he’d done it. You really do get what you pay for. It grazed my collar, when I wore a collar, which was something that I’d left behind in the rain with my everyday existence.

‘That’s what I asked him. He said that my hair was long, so yours had to be short.’

‘What? He’d turn down a screw because he doesn’t like the way someone wear their hair.’

‘Weird, isn’t it. Turns out he has a bit of a thing about short hair.’

‘So why hasn’t he asked you to cut yours?’

‘He has, but it’s sort of a seniority thing. You’re the new girl, so you get to do it.’

‘Let’s just kill this idea stone dead, shall we? I’m not screwing a teenager and I’m not cutting my hair.

‘What was it we just agreed? That you should just let yourself go while you’re here. Give him a go, just once, see what happens.’

I could sense that things were getting tense again and engineered an end to the conversation.

Over the next day or two, things eased between us. I’d spent a lot of time out walking on my own and had no idea what she got up to while I was out. It could have all been perfectly innocent and when I got back she was all sweetness and light. If she was seeing the boy while I was out, she was being careful. We hadn’t mentioned the events of the “incident” and there’d been no further mention of me getting together with the pool boy. It was only when we were at breakfast that I realised that it was the day for him to come to actually clean the pool rather than to offer additional services. Neither of us mentioned anything and after breakfast, Amy headed out to relax by the pool and I headed up to my room.

I sat there feeling foolish. There was a lot of truth in what she said. Why shouldn’t I have some fun while I was away?

The only thing was that I’d never considered my fun being so young, younger than my own son and already occupying the attentions of someone who I still regarded as a friend and whose villa I was currently staying in. I’d encountered a man several times on my little excursions. We were on nodding terms now, even though we appeared not to be in a position to exchange a few words as our paths crossed. He was still probably slightly younger than me, but well within an acceptable range and one that wouldn’t merit a second glance in polite society. If only I knew how to say to him that I was up for a roll in the hay if he was, no strings attached. Instead, I had been indirectly propositioned by a teenager, who had the temerity to lay down conditions in order to consider bedding me. He deserved a damn good hiding for even thinking that.

I pottered about for a while, hoping to pass the time until the coast was clear. I knew that he liked to make an early start, so hoped that he’d be away for when I wanted to go and lie by the pool.

I went to check whether it was safe, only to be faced with the stuff of porn movies. Pool boy was feasting on Amy, his head buried between her legs as she lay prone on a lounger. I turned away from the window in shock and embarrassment, before being drawn back by curiosity. Amy lay there without a care in the world, her hands gripping his hair, holding him tight to her. Her face was turned away, so I could only imagine her expression, while I marvelled at her ability to take her pleasure where she could, regardless of circumstances or surroundings. I started to envy her. I imagined lying there like that, abandoned to my basest instincts. Amy’s head turned, I darted back into the shadows, wondering whether I was quick enough. I decided to tidy a drawer.

I left it a good half hour before venturing near a window again. Amy was alone, reading on her lounger as if nothing had happened. I read a magazine for a few minutes before going out to join her.

Neither of us said anything, and despite exchanging pleasantries over the next couple of hours, there was no reference to her post-breakfast treat. It was only when we were having a mid-afternoon glass of wine that she broached the subject.

‘Jordi was sorry to miss you this morning’ she said.

‘He comes so early’ I replied.

‘He always comes just at the right time’ she replied with a smile.

I didn’t reply.

‘Did you like it?’ she asked.

‘What?’ I asked.

‘Watching’ she replied. I could feel myself blush. I didn’t want to lie, but I didn’t want to acknowledge that it was the hottest thing that I’d seen for quite some time. Thankfully she didn’t pursue the topic.

The following morning, Amy caught me off guard.

‘I thought we could pop into town. Have some lunch. Get you in somewhere for a haircut’ she said casually.

I looked at her.

‘You’re scheming aren’t you’ I replied.

‘Jordi asked about you.’


‘So, I thought we could have a girls’ day out in town. Do some shopping, get pampered, you know, just indulge ourselves.’

‘And I would be getting a haircut because..?’

‘Because you want to.’

‘If I wanted to, don’t you think that I would do something about it?’

‘Don’t tell me you haven’t thought about it being you on the sun-lounger next time. A quick trip to the salon and Bob’s your nephew’ she said, clearly pleased with her repartee.

‘Don’t you think that you should give pool boy and I a little more credit than that?’

‘Not at all. He said he’d screw you in an instant if you got rid of that hair.’ She looked at me, almost taunting me, daring me.

‘I hope he was a bit less direct than that’ was all that I could think to reply.

‘He actually said “fuck”, but I thought I’d tone it down for you. But believe me, the boy fucks.

‘I’ll take your word for it.’

‘Will you come anyway, keep me company?’

‘You’re going to the hairdressers?’

She nodded.

‘You’re just saying that to get me to go, I’ll bet’

‘Not at all. I want to surprise him now that I know it’s a turn-on for him. Anyway, I can’t have you stealing him from me, can I?’

‘Who said I’m going to do what he wants?’

‘Have a trim, just enough to get noticed’ she said.

I shrugged.

We got ready and headed to town, parking in the same shady spot that always seemed to be waiting for us when we came in. I took a deep breath and started the short walk into the town centre.

‘I’m sure we’ll need appointments. We can’t just waltz in like that’ I said as our destination came into view.

‘Already taken care of’ she replied.

‘You made appointments, for me, for us?’ I stated incredulously.

‘Why not?’ she replied, about to launch into a more detailed rebuttal, but something caught her eye over my shoulder. I turned to see what it was that had distracted her. Jordi. I should have known.

He swaggered towards us as if it were pure coincidence that we were about to go into a salon to do his bidding. Amy moved past me to welcome him.

At least that’s what I thought it was. The welcome deteriorated quickly until they were talking sharply to each other. I couldn’t understand a word, but Amy’s command of the language was impressive. She was in full flight, both in verbal and non-verbal communication. The gestures were bandied about freely until Jordi turned on his heel and went back the way that he’d come. I watched him go, appreciating his lean body, his dark hair.

‘What was all that about?’ I asked, slightly concerned.

‘Nothing. You don’t want to know’ she replied sharply.

‘It didn’t look like nothing and if I didn’t want to know, I wouldn’t have asked.’

She went and sat on a bench in silence. I sat next to her and put my hand over hers.

‘I’m sorry, he just annoyed me so much’ she explained.

I looked at my watch. It was five past. Common sense told me that any appointment would have been on the hour.

‘Shouldn’t we?’ I asked, looking towards the salon.

‘I don’t want to now. You go if you like’ she replied.

‘I don’t want to. I came to keep you company, that’s all’ I replied.

‘Let’s go and get a drink’ she said.

‘Aren’t you going to tell them we’re not coming?’

‘I suspect that they heard’ she smiled, getting to her feet.

It was the following day when she’d calmed down enough to tell me what the eruption had been about. Pool boy had chosen that moment to reveal that his ‘hair thing’ was a ‘no hair thing’. He’d asked her to shave her head. Can you imagine? She’d gone off at the deep end, as I’d seen, if not understood. I asked her whether he’d included me in his request, but apparently she hadn’t given him the chance. He’d back-pedalled and said that he’d accept a crew-cut, which I thought was pretty considerate of him. She’d offered to cut his balls off and told him that they were finished.

That seemed reasonable. I could see the trace of a smile on her lips, but she was clearly still very annoyed. She retired to a lounger by the pool and consoled herself with a glass of wine or two.

I was on my way back out from a trip to the kitchen for a top-up when I heard her on the phone. I couldn’t make out what she was saying, but I was pretty sure that she wasn’t speaking English. She ended the call abruptly when she sensed me coming back and made no reference to it when I handed her another drink. It was slightly odd, but I thought no more about it.

I took myself off for a walk the next day, eager to give both of us a bit of breathing room. I’d already called her my “cell-mate” a couple of times and wanted to try to avoid us living hand-in-glove. She’d been good enough to let me be her house guest for a while, but I didn’t want to be her roomie. It was late evening when I got back, the heat of the day having gone, although it was still warmer than I was used to back home on most summer days.

I walked down the shady corridor, smiling at the urge to call out “Hi honey, I’m home”, but I could sense that I was alone in the villa. I put my bag down and moved over to the kitchen window, smiling at my attempt at stealth. I peeked round the frame and saw something that I hadn’t expected, but had at the same time, if you know what I mean. Jordi and Amy were in the process of making up. They’d decided that the best way to do this would be for him to be sitting on a chair and for her to be astride him. Her back was to me, her arms around him, her movement slight. I envied her for a moment, the way that she had an outlet for her urges, but no apparent commitment. The two of them spent little time together as far as I knew, but most of that was spent on pleasurable activities. Sure they’d had a flare up yesterday, but they were back to doing what they do best. I saw a slight change in the angle of Jordi’s head. He wasn’t focussed on Amy anymore. He was on his guard, aware that they weren’t alone, that they were being watched. I felt guilty about intruding on something so very private, felt guilty about enjoying watching them. I moved out of the shadows to where he could see me properly. There was an almost imperceptible nod of his head by way of a greeting and then he was back to concentrating on what was in his lap. A woman old enough to be his mother.

I watched for several minutes, no longer embarrassed. I was there with Jordi’s consent and I doubt that Amy would’ve objected. She’d challenged me about the other time that I’d turned Peeping Tom, but in a way that told me that she knew, rather than she objected. Anyway, he must’ve known that I wouldn’t be out late. I caressed my boobs through my dress in the absence of someone to do it for me. I saw Jordi look towards the window again and then watched him thrust forcefully upwards when he could see that I was watching. Just the once, then it was back to the subtle motion.

I wanted to get closer, but didn’t want to spoil the tableau. I was watching live porn, where I knew the participants. I didn’t make a habit of watching any other sort of porn, but wouldn’t claim that it never happened. It just didn’t do that much for me. It had started to become more frequent in recent months though, which was surely telling me something about the state of my love-life, or lack of one.

I marvelled at Jordi’s control, how so unlike an eager young man he appeared. He looked like he wanted to give pleasure rather than just take it for himself. I started to understand why Amy had no qualms about his age. What did it matter when you could watch the sunset while getting an unhurried screw. I wanted to go out, but didn’t want to ruin their moment. I wondered how I could do it: saunter out as if it were the most natural thing in the world or strip off and join them? I turned to the back door, my eyes drawn to a selection of gadgets and implements attached to a magnetic strip. My part in the play came to me in an instant.

I opened the door, Jordi looking up at the sound, Amy shifting her stance slightly. There was no squeal of embarrassment, no shouted objection at the intrusion. The rhythm such as there was, went unbroken. Jordi was watching me, his attention on me now rather than on Amy. She didn’t need his full attention and he knew it. She’d got the bit of him that mattered and as for him, he looked like a carefree teenager riding a bike with no hands. I felt slightly awkward at being fully clothed while faced with their nakedness. It would’ve been polite to strip off before I came out, but that hadn’t been at the forefront of my min