I met Shane and Amber at the gym, and we’ve become close friends. Normally I would have hated someone like Shane; he is toxic masculinity incarnate. He drives a big obnoxious truck, always talks about how he could kick people’s asses, and he doesn’t seem to own any shirts with sleeves. Then again, normally Shane would have hated someone like me. I drive a Prius, use terms like “toxic masculinity” unironically, and fuck his wife on a regular basis.
But that is something begged me to do. There is nothing he loves more than watching another man fuck his wife while she verbally abuses him. The worse she treats him, the happier it makes him. I can’t imagine why anyone would enjoy that, but hey, I’ve got my own kinks, and I don’t judge.
Amber, his wife, is absolutely gorgeous. She works out obsessively, and it shows. She loves wearing gym outfits that cover as little as is allowed so all the other guys can see the body that Shane isn’t allowed to touch. The only part of her that he is allowed to touch is her hair, and beautiful hair it is. Perfectly straight and perfectly blonde, it stretches more than half way down her back when she wears it down. It takes a lot of effort to maintain that hair. For almost an hour every morning, Shane washes, conditions and straightens Amber’s hair while she scrolls through Instagram and ignores him. A few months ago, she made a deal with Shane that if he can take care of her hair well enough that it reaches the tattoo on her lower back, which is an outline of the state of Texas, he can eat her pussy for 5 minutes, one time. At this point, the longest of her hair is a few millimeters away from the top of panhandle.
Tonight is Shane’s birthday, and Amber was going to treat him to something he’d never forget.
I showed up around 9 PM. I don’t exactly go on real dates with Amber. I show up at their house, we have a couple glasses of wine while she tells me all the ways her husband is inadequate as a man right in front of his face, then I fuck her brains out, and leave. I brought over a nice bottle of cabernet tonight. Shane was wearing a pink dress when I arrived, as Amber had forbidden him from wearing men’s clothing when, as she put it, real men are coming over. Amber and I flirted with each other as we drank the wine, gradually removing each other’s clothes. She poured the rest of the bottle into Shane’s water dish and let him finish it.
“Time to put you away” she scolded Shane, as I finished slowly removing her panties. He skulked to the cage in the master bedroom, which was probably intended to be a crate for a large dog. I kissed Amber and massaged her clit as we made our way to the bed. She closed the cage and sealed it with a padlock.
“Can you go down on me first?” she asked me, as she lied on the bed. I knelt at the bedside, slipped two fingers into her soaking pussy and licked her just the way she liked it. Couldn’t have been more than 3 of 4 minutes before she clenched up, pushing down on my head and crying out in ecstasy.
“It’s so nice to be with a man who actually knows how to pleasure a woman. I don’t think my husband could find my clit if it had a neon sign pointing at it.” she scoffed with disgust.
“You’re seriously going to let him eat your pussy?” I asked her, feigning shock.
She laid down on the bed and spread her legs wide in the air, running her fingers through the neatly-manicured tuft of pubic hair above her smooth pussy, and down to her clit, which was not hard to find. Her head hung off the edge of the bed and she tilted it back, her blonde hair cascading to the floor. She looked Shane in the eyes as I slowly inserted my cock.
“Well a deal’s a deal. He loves my hair and has been taking great care of it. There’s nothing my husband likes more than blondes. Unfortunately, I promised that disgusting pig he could eat me out for 5 minutes if my hair gets to Texas, and it almost has.” She explained to me, pausing each time I thrust in and out of her “But…” she continued “the key word there is…”
She reached beneath the bed for an item, then looked directly at Shane again.
If I didn’t know what she was about to do, I would have assumed from the loud buzzing noise that the object she had produced from under the bed was some king of vibrator, but that’s not what she had planned. She took the buzzing clippers, showed them to Shane, and placed them straight in the middle of her forehead. Just as she started the motions to push it back, she stopped and looked up at me. I paused as she stared at me with a mortified look on her face.
“Wait, what was I thinking? I can’t believe I really almost did that!” She said in what seemed like a state of shock, staring at the buzzing clippers, which had an 8mm guard on them, and turning them off.
“I seriously just almost… forgot to take the guard off first.”
She popped the guard off the clippers, leaned her head back down, and as I resumed my thrusts, she drove them right down the middle of her scalp.
“Oh my god” Shane muttered, his face weirdly contorted.
“Shut… the fuck… up… you… moron” She made her best effort to shout back at him, pausing each time she reciprocated the movement of my hips, moving the clippers back and forth in unison over the top of her head. She couldn’t hold it anymore. She had an orgasm so strong that it knocked her off the bed.
At this point, all the hair on the top of her head, and some of the hair on the sides, was gone. As I got off the bed to check on her, she handed me the clippers and started giving me a blow job. I’d never used clippers on such long hair before, and I moved extra carefully to cut as close to the scalp as possible without cutting her. As luck would have it, I timed it perfectly. The last little bit of blonde hair came off right as I couldn’t hold it anymore. She spit it on the floor for Shane to clean up later.
Amber rubbed her scalp. She was a natural blonde, so it was hard to tell there was any hair left at all, but it was rough to the touch. She went to the bathroom and came back with shaving cream and a handful of disposable razors. Lying on her back, she beckoned my tongue to her smooth, wet pussy. As I went down on her again, she spread the foam over her head and began scraping away. I consider myself pretty adept with my tongue, but I have never made a woman cum that hard and that frequently. Not even close. As she experienced her final climax of the night, she rubbed her scalp thoroughly, careful to ensure she hadn’t missed a spot.
She kissed me again, tasting her juices on my tongue, then turned to Shane.
“You better not have cum! Show me that you didn’t cum yet!” She commanded him.
“I swear…” she continued as she unlocked the crate “If you disobeyed me and got jizz on my dress, I am never going to grow my hair back”
“I didn’t… I didn’t cum yet.” he stammered.
She felt his crotch and slapped him in the face, reaching down and grabbing his dick through the dress.
“Good.” She grinned devilishly at him and kept holding on “Because if you had gotten any of your disgusting fluids on my pink dress, I swear, I would have never let you see my blonde hair ever again. Hell, I would have shaved my eyebrows off too. And maybe, just maybe I might have considered growing my armpit hair out and letting you touch it every once in a while. You’re lucky. If you had cum, your hot blonde wife would have been a bald slut free for anyone but you forever.”
“Ungggh!” he winced. She pulled her hand away in disgust.
“Ew! I told you not to cum, you fucking pervert.” she taunted him as she shoved him back into his cage and locked it. She swept the blonde tresses into a pile. “Say goodbye to this because it’s the last time you’ll ever see my blonde hair!” She carried the pile into the kitchen and dumped it into the trash, bringing the trash can back with her so Shane could watch as she shook it and mingled the severed hair with the remains of tonight’s dinner. She wiped off all the tatters of her former hair that had stuck to her sweaty body and threw them in with the rest.
Next, Amber slowly bent over in front of Shane’s cage as she picked the shaving cream back up off the bed and spread it over each of her eyebrows.
“You’re never going to have a hot blonde wife again.” She teased him.
She picked up one of the razors, passing over each eyebrow a few times with the razor to make sure they were completely gone.
“I’m going to keep it smooth like this for good, and when I’m wearing a wig, it’ll be black, or brunette, or maybe purple, but never blonde.” she said with a wickedness in her eyes.
“But when I am at home with you, I’ll always be bald. I’ll replace our morning hair routine with my morning shaving routine, except you won’t get to participate. Actually, better yet, there’s that place I went for my bikini line, the laser hair removal place. I’ll just go by there tomorrow and see if they can zap it all off.” she laughed as she gleefully rubbed her smooth head.
She looked back at me, and looked down. I was rock hard.
“Oh good.” she said to me “You’re down for a round two tonight.”
I pointed at the triangle of light brown hair still attached to her crotch. “I see there’s still a little bit left to go.”