What’s In a Name……

Warning: this story is a little dark so be mindful of that.

“Tonight’s the night. And it’s going to happen again and again. It has to happen.”

A quote from Miserae’s favorite show. Like this fictional character she has a need that must be quenched. An unbearable desire that requires a victim to feel her blade. Her prey are chosen wisely and must fit certain criteria. The innocent, the meek, or the outcasts are not chosen. No, her victims are the liars, the bullies, and the deserving. Just talking mannequins that masquerade as people.

Her inner demon has incredible intuition. A photographic memory allows her to remember every face, every location and license plate to stalk her projects. She carefully honed her skills over the years becoming proficient in stealth, martial arts, and disguise. But the skill she liked most was psychology. The ability to manipulate someone’s mind and bend their will to her’s before the final blow was dealt. She didn’t always have these skills as her life started out rather ordinary before a series of cataclysms destroyed the person she was.

Miserae’s victims are usually found in her daily life. Everyday we all encounter people who are rude. They cut us off in traffic, butt in line, treat us disrespectful at work or even post crude comments on social media. All of these transgressions and many others provide a fertile hunting ground.

But the main requisite for Miserae’s victims are that they are female. Not that she had anything against males but thought they were too easy to manipulate so the challenge wasn’t there. Bringing a woman to her knees was more gratifying to her.

Miserae’s inner demon was brought into her life at a young age. A happy childhood with loving parents until she was 8 when her world began to disintegrate. Her mother who showered her with love and kindness was killed in a car crash. The father trying to cope with the loss began a downward spiral into alcohol and drugs that led to his demise a year later.

Miserae was taken in by her aunt Pam who lived in a rural town in the Midwest. She had 2 insufferable boys of her own. The father had abandoned the family years ago so Pam struggled to pay the bills and saw Miserae as extra income. The state gave her a modest check to provide for Miserae’s needs but not enough by Pam’s estimate. This created animosity towards Miserae by the whole family as she was mistreated and bullied by her male cousins. She’d do extra chores and even would take on the brothers work of mowing the yard and taking out the trash to hopefully garner any favor but to no avail. She was the outsider.

By the time she reached high school, things hadn’t improved. Her families supposed lack of money resulted in her wearing thrift store clothing which the other kids made fun of incessantly. But Miserae was an attractive girl despite her circumstance. A slim body with a pretty face and emerald green eyes. Her skin was pale as she spent most of her time reading in her room. It was Miserae’s only escape from her family. Her long jet black hair parted down middle always covered her face except for just enough to see out of. It was a security blanket of sorts to her. A way she could hide. Even though the clothes were from the thrift store she choose dark colors or camouflage army gear for kind of a grunge look. Her cousins were given clothes from regular stores and often made fun of her at school as well.

By Miserae’s junior year in high school, her cousins had both found girlfriend’s so they ignored her most of the time. Miserae had also begun to hang out with a guy from school. He was an outcast like her.

They met in the library when she bumped into him in an aisle as her hair blocked her vision. She apologized and scrambled away embarrassed. They both liked to read and began to notice each other in the library. The boy finally got up the nerve to speak to her and told her his name was Shawn. They began to talk regularly after that while spending time together in the library which they called “The Refuge”. The only place they felt comfortable. Shawn’s home life was also a wreck as his parents argued all the time. The constant shouting and fighting had given him extreme anxiety. These two lost souls found comfort and safety with each other. But even more so, someone that cared.

Over time the relationship between them grew strong and they were nearly inseparable. Miserae found a happiness that had eluded her since the loss of her parents. During school, after school and even her dreams were focused on Shawn.

Her aunt Pam had noticed as well. Though Miserae’s grades were improved and her chores were done as usual, her cousins were not happy. She no longer did the yard work or took out the trash for them like before. This took time away from them being with their girlfriends which at that age was torturous. The brothers constant complaining to Pam about Miserae made her furious. She of course took the side of her two son’s and scolded Miserae for being lazy on her chores. Miserae knew better than to argue so she complied without question.

Miserae confided in Shawn about the unfair treatment and how she hated her family. He listened as the emotions escaped from Miserae’s lips till she sobbed on his shoulder. Like a warm shower his embrace washed away the hurt brought on by her filth of a family.

On an unusually hot day in mid September, Miserae was doing her weekly yard work when her cousins approached the front concrete path. Walking hand in hand with their girlfriends, they went past her to the front porch then sat on the swing. One brother went inside and brought out a pitcher of ice tea for the four of them to drink. They all drank from their cold condensate covered glasses as they watched Miserae toil at her labor without offering her any refreshment. One of the girls mentioned to the boys that their cousin must be hot. The other girlfriend chimed in with, “probably so with all that long hair”. The brothers looked at each other deviously and the four of them went inside the house.

About an hour later Miserae had finished the yard work and walked into the air conditioned house. It felt so good as she made her way to the fridge for something cold to drink. Pam walked into the kitchen and told her not to eat anything as they were all going out for dinner tonight.

Miserae drank her soda real quick and went upstairs to get a shower. She felt so good after washing the grime and sweat from her body. She blow dryed her mid back ebony locks and applied very sparse makeup on her slightly red tinged skin from working in the sun. Pam had strangely laid out clothes for her to wear which she never did. Camouflage paints, white t-shirt, and a black leather vest. Not a terrible combination she thought.

They all piled into Pam’s Suburban and headed into town. The town was basically just the square with a large courtyard in the middle. Mom and pop shops with a couple little diners. Pam parked in front of the hardware store which had a diner on one side and a barbershop on the other.

Miserae got out of the SUV and headed left towards the diner as she was famished from the yard work. Pam reached out and took Miserae by the arm leading her the opposite direction stating they had something to do first. Walking past the hardware store, Pam stopped as she reached the door for the barbershop and opened it. She held it for everyone to enter then turned the sign on the door to closed before shutting it.

Miserae and her cousins girlfriends took a seat on the bench while the boys walked over to the barber chair. They didn’t sit down in the chair but simply stood on either side of it. Weird. Pam talked with the barber who just nodded and looked over at the bench. Pam asked Miserae to come over to her as she stood near the barber chair. Miserae felt uneasy at the request but was afraid of the consequences of Pam getting angry.

As Miserae got to within a couple feet of the chair, Pam shoved her down into it and the brothers grabbed her arms tightly holding her to the chair. The barber threw a cape over her and fastened it tightly around her neck. Miserae struggled to get up but the boys were far stronger than her.

The brothers laughed at her feeble attempt to get away as Pam smirked. Miserae cried and screamed as she drew upon every ounce of strength at her disposal but it was all for naught. The barber placed duct tape over her mouth to silence her to just a muffle. Pam looked over at the bench to the girlfriends then to her sons and asked, “What should we give her?”

The girls said with a giddiness, “something really short” because she looked too hot out there working earlier like they really cared for Miserae’s well being. The brothers just laughed and said, “shave her head”. Pam looked down at Miserae and said, “We’ll do a little bit of both. Give my little camouflaged trooper here a haircut to match her pants. Make it a horseshoe flattop.”

Miserae’s eyes nearly bulged from their sockets as Pam uttered those words. The girls on the bench began laughing and pulled out their phones to record the humiliation about to be unleashed on Miserae. The barber combed through her thick dark locks as they cascaded down her back for the last time.

Miserae could hear the barber fumbling around with something on the counter before hearing a loud “pop”. A high pitched mechanical noise filled the shop that sounded like a mixer. The brothers held her arms down so tight that her hands began to go numb. Tears flowed from her reddened eyes as there was nothing she could do.

A hand pushed Miserae’s head forward and held it there as she felt cold steel on her neck beneath her hair. The pitch lowered as the machine bit into her hair as it’s thickness defiantly put up a struggle. The cool air that blew from the clippers at the beginning gradually warmed with the resistance it now faced but Miserae’s fate was a certainty. Even her thick dark hair could only slightly hinder the machines hunger as it made its way up her pale white scalp. Sheets of glossy black hair slid down from her head to the floor as an audience watched.

The brothers girlfriends on the bench recorded every second and made commentary as they joked about the pitiful sight. Pam stood smug in front of her seemingly not really caring about what was going on. The brothers just laughed at their girlfriends bad jokes as they held Miserae down.

The barber continued with his job running the clippers up into Miserae’s hair to almost the top of her head. Her little ears which hadn’t seen light in years were now fully exposed with just dark stubble covering most of her head. The only remaining long hair was the front that she hid behind for years which the barber lifted with a comb and slid the blades across only an inch from her scalp. Her face that held so much pain was now clear for all to see. Miserae’s sobbing was uncontrollable without her security blanket.

As the haircut began to take shape, a different set of clippers was used which buzzed loudly around Miserae’s head. Tiny shards of ebony sprinkled across her cheeks and down her neck. The blades rattled against a comb by the front of her head but were pressed firmly to skin further back. Not satisfied with the result, the barber lathered Miserae’s head with shaving cream and edged out her horseshoe. Gliding the razor up the back and sides before sliding it over the crown of her head taking it down smooth to the skin. Once more he brought out the humming clippers and meticulously took fractions of an inch off getting her hair to his idea of perfection. With that goal achieved, the clippers were put away.

Miserae was numb. Literally and figuratively as her hands had no feeling in them. The brothers released her as the barber brushed her off. Miserae felt the cold air conditioning blowing across her scalp as she came out of her shock. The cape was removed and Miserae stood up from the chair then turned to look in the mirror.

Miserae’s head was nearly bald except for the black U-shaped rim of hair towards the front. The shape of a horseshoe. She touched the back, the sides, and center which were totally hairless. Her slightly sun burned face contrasting with the pale milky skin of her scalp.

The brothers had joined their girlfriends over at the bench as they pointed and laughed at her. Pam was paying the barber for Miserae’s haircut and just didn’t care about what had just transpired.

Pam said, “Let’s go eat, I’m hungry. That is unless you want your girlfriends to get a horseshoe flattop as well while we’re here.” They all ran out of the shop towards the diner.

“Thank the barber for the fine job he did”, Pam commanded.

“Thank you sir. You did a fine job on my hair.”, Miserae meekly managed.

Pam said sarcastically, “I think she likes that haircut. She’ll probably be back in few weeks for a trim”. Pam walked out the door and Miserae followed slowly. Before she reached the door she turned to see the barber sweeping up a huge pile of long black hair and emptying into his trash can. Just tossed like common garbage even though it was so precious to her.

The diner was packed with people getting dinner and Miserae had to go in. Kids from school with their parents watched her walk in as she made her way to the table. Hushed whispers and snickering could be heard from the patrons as she walked by in humiliation. During dinner, her cousins would rub her head while their girlfriends texted pictures of Miserae to friends and laugh at the replies. This dinner couldn’t be over soon enough.

The next day at school was far worse for Miserae. Everyone laughed and harassed her all day. She normally was an outcast but today she was the most famous kid in school for the worst reason.

At lunch she met up with Shawn in the library as usual. He was the only kind person to her. When he saw Miserae he was shocked at first but told her she actually wore it well as it brought out her beautiful green eyes. Her emotions were overwhelmed and she kissed him on the lips for the first time. Her eyes welled up and she said, “I love you, Shawn”. The two slipped out of school back to his house where they both experienced intimacy for the first time. This drew them closer and they found the love they always wanted.

Over the next several weeks they found ways to continue their intimacy without skipping school. Their careful planning payed off as they took every opportunity to explore their bodies. For the amount of emotional pain they both endured, this physical contact brought out passion they never knew existed.

Halloween was on Friday and they made plans to meet up after school for a private party just for them.

Friday before school, Pam told Miserae to come home right after class to do yard work so the house looked good for the trick or treaters. This put a dent in their plans but Miserae figured she could rush it and still have a good evening with Shawn.

Miserae told Shawn of the new plan at school and she would meet him at the park at 7 pm. Miserae worked as fast as she could to finish but Pam kept adding more things to the list. She did almost everything except polish the dirt in the yard. It was insane. 7 pm had come and gone. She rushed inside to get a shower before meeting up with Shawn who was hopefully still at the park waiting for her.

As Miserae finished her make-up she heard sirens going by the house. She went out into the darkness to see the flashing red lights in the distance towards town. Her neighbor said he heard a trick or treater had been hit by a car. Miserae said she hoped they were alright. She grabbed her bike and rode toward the lights. As this was a small town with very little crime, they only had two police officers.

When Miserae got closer she could see the police cars along with a sports car that had front end damage with a crushed piece of metal jutting out from it’s grill.

Across the street by the curb she could see someone on their side with blood on them. She was able to get close because of the limited police force. The metal sticking out of the car was the mangled frame of a bicycle. Miserae could see a back pack laying in the street that kinda looked familiar. An ominous feeling passed over her at this vague recognition.

Miserae moved closer to where the person was in the street. The sheriff saw her moving toward the body and yelled for her to stop. She got within 10 feet of the person before she dropped to her knees and screamed. The backpack was familiar because it was Shawn’s. Miserae crawled towards the body and put her arms around him telling him to wake up. Shawn’s eyes were open but no life was in them. His dirty blonde hair was soaked with blood from a head wound with no chance of survival. Miserae wailed and cursed the world for taking him away from her. The sheriff didn’t have the heart to pull her away so he waited for the paramedics to arrive.

Miserae was given a mild sedative to calm her enough so they could remove Shawn’s body. She watched as they loaded him onto a stretcher for transport. The sedative couldn’t possibly calm her down from what came next. The passengers in the car that hit Shawn were her cousins girlfriends and their friends. Miserae ran at them wanting to know who did it. None of them would admit to who drove the car as the sheriff grabbed Miserae and placed her in the back of his squad car. She screamed and beat on the window wanting vengeance for her lover.

The funeral was held 5 days later. Miserae’s neighbor drove her to the service
as she cut off all communication with her family even though she still lived with them. Her family didn’t attend as they sided with the brothers girlfriends. Miserae met Shawn’s parents who were devastated by the loss but also were going through a divorce. Miserae said only a few words in her eulogy, “Shawn was the only person in this world who cared about me. I loved him more than anything, and he loved me for who I am. He was my only family.”

The police investigation into Shawn’s death was a joke. All the girls in the sports car made a statement that he drove out in front of the car on purpose. They brought up his anxiety issues and the impending divorce of his parents as the reason for his behavior. The local DA bought it and dropped the investigation.

Thanksgiving is tomorrow and Pam had the audacity to invite her son’s girlfriends to dinner. Especially after the lies they told about Shawn. She insisted Miserae have dinner with them to end the animosity between them. Pam also insisted things go back to normal with the family. As a gift of goodwill she brought Miserae back to the barbershop for a free haircut on her dime. The barber shaved off the freshly grown inch of soft pelt from her scalp and took the horseshoe even tighter so Miserae had barely more than stubble surrounding a giant barren spot on top of her head. She was nearly bald this time.

The next morning Pam set out the clothes for Miserae to wear. A pretty long white dress with orange fall leaves on it and white stockings. A sharp contrast to the very butch haircut she received yesterday.

Dinner was served at 5 pm. A large turkey with stuffing and all the trimmings. The meal was going off without a hitch for about 15 minutes even though Miserae noticed the girls kept glancing over at her with grins on their faces.

“Can I have a slice of that shaved ham?”, Quipped one of the girls barely able to keep her composure. “The turkey is really delicious ma’am, is it a Butterbald?” said the other girl fighting not to laugh. “I don’t know, I just see a plucked chicken” said one of the brothers as the 4 burst out into laughter. Pam choked on her food at the joke. Miserae had enough and lept up from her chair grabbing the carving knife before lunging across the table at the girls.

“WHO DROVE THE FUCKING CAR?” Miserae screamed in a demonic sounding voice as one of her cousins caught her arm before the blade found a target. She dropped the knife and said, “I hate all of you”.

Her aunt Pam had a fury in her eyes.

“HOW FUCKING DARE YOU RUIN THIS MEAL, MICHELLE?! I gave you a roof over your head when your parents died. Food, clothes, a new family and this is what you give me? MISERY? Misery follows you everywhere. Your parents, your boyfriend and look what you done to this family. You ungrateful little bitch. Take your misery and get the fuck out of my sight”.

Michelle went to her room seething with anger. There was no family here. Just an endless supply of misery. All the “real” family that cared for her was buried in the cold ground.

Later that night after her aunt and cousins went to bed, Michelle stuffed her backpack with some of her belongings and crept down the stairs to her bicycle outside. She looked at the house with those pieces of shit inside then walked over to the shed.

Michelle had walked the half mile to the service station and filled up the 5 gallon jug of gas the last time she mowed. She splashed the fuel on the sides of the house then dumped larger amounts at the exits to the home. She had a lighter which she used to light the candles in Shawn’s room from when they made love. Michelle set fire to the pretty dress her aunt Pam had given her and threw it at the house igniting a blaze. She got on her bike pedaling furiously away from the inferno.

Michelle rode all night to a larger town who had a bus service. She approached the ticket booth with her hoodie pulled up over her head and sunglasses to hide her face. The station attendant asked for her destination and Michelle said, “Out west, I want to see the ocean”.

The attendant smiled and said, “I know just the place. What is your name for the ticket”?

“Miserae. People call me Miserae.”