Snagg
Best Haircut for the Wilderness
Julius kept driving farther and farther north, as far away from Stockholm as possible. He’d stopped only once at a gas station to fill up, take a piss, and stock up on snacks and drinks.
Hard, pounding techno blasted from the speakers. He hadn’t listened to techno in years, probably not since the last time he’d been to a club in Berlin.
Now he was 40 years old and no longer felt up to spending a night at a club. The job had drained all his energy. All the overtime, all the business trips.
He briefly glanced at himself in the rearview mirror: expensive sunglasses perched on his nose, his slightly wavy, slicked-back blond hair now streaked with a few gray strands, and his well-groomed three-day stubble.
He had tossed his tie onto the passenger seat hours ago and unbuttoned the top buttons of his tailored light-blue shirt, revealing a slightly hairy, muscular chest.
At breakfast, Carl, his husband, had told him that he’d met someone else, someone who made him feel more welcome.
“Over the past few years, I’ve often felt like you don’t even see me anymore,” Carl had said. “After breakfast, I’ll pack up my most important stuff and move out. I’ll come back for the rest later, if that’s okay with you.”
Julius pulled over to the right side of the road. Tears streamed down his cheeks. He was crying, for the first time since he’d become an adult.
He had lost Carl. Why had he let it get this far? Why hadn’t he been more attentive to him? Why had he been so damn focused on his career at that startup, where his dedication had ultimately been rewarded by getting fired today! Poor quarterly results, a sluggish order book, necessary restructuring… blah, blah, blah.
He opened Airbnb. He needed a place to stay for the night.
Just a few minutes’ drive away, there was a small vacation home for rent, right on a lake, on the property of a guy named Einar, who lived next door in the main house.
Julius booked for three nights. He received immediate confirmation and set off. He left the highway, turned onto smaller roads, and finally onto an unpaved, bumpy path that led to his destination.
Julius parked next to the main house, next to a mud-splattered pickup.
When he got out, the front door opened and a man about his age stepped out. The guy was about half a head shorter than Julius and strongly built. His face was weather-beaten, his brown hair was buzzed down to a few millimeters, and his short beard looked neglected. He was wearing a holey olive-green T-shirt and gray sweatpants cut off above the knees.
“You must be Julius,” he said, introducing himself as Einar. “I’m glad I still have guests coming in September. Most people come from June through August.”
“I like to travel in September,” Julius said as they walked toward a reddish-brown wooden cabin.
Einar gave Julius a quick tour of the place, handed him the key, and said goodbye. “If you need anything, just knock on my door!”
Julius felt exhausted and decided to go to sleep, even though it was only 8 o’clock.
The next morning, he woke up around 6. He took a warm shower and then wanted to blow-dry his hair, but there was no hair dryer.
He looked out the window and saw that Einar was already walking around outside, wearing the same worn-out clothes as yesterday. He opened the window and called out, “Do you happen to have a hair dryer?”
Einar laughed. “Do I look like the kind of guy who’d own a hair dryer?”
Julius took a hoodie out of the suitcase he’d packed in a hurry yesterday, along with a pair of sweatpants, then stepped outside into the cool morning air.
“Where’s the nearest supermarket?” he asked Einar, who was now sitting on the steps in front of his house with a cup of coffee.
Einar squinted into the sun. “Do you need anything for breakfast?”
Julius nodded. “I didn’t buy anything yesterday.”
“The nearest supermarket is half an hour further north.” Einar stood up. “I suggest you have breakfast here with me and go shopping later.”
“I don’t want to be a bother…”
“If inviting you over for breakfast were a bother to me, I wouldn’t do it.”
“Is there a gym nearby?” Julius asked after they had finished breakfast. “Maybe in the area where the supermarket is?”
“There’s no gym there.”
“But there has to be one somewhere. I mean, you look pretty fit…”
“The nearest gym is right here, in my garage. The door’s always open. Feel free to use my equipment!”
After the third night, Julius asked if it would be possible to stay longer.
“There aren’t any other reservations right now,” Einar replied. “Stay as long as you like!”
The days went by. Julius used Einar’s gym. He went swimming several times a day, even though the water was quite cold. He went for walks in the woods and drove to the supermarket every other day.
Otherwise, he had stopped wearing his fancy shirts and pants and had bought a few basic T-shirts and practical outdoor pants instead.
“Want to go for a boat ride?” Einar asked one afternoon. “I want to catch something for dinner.”
They climbed into the small motorboat, which was moored at the little wooden dock, and headed out onto the lake.
Einar steered the boat through the islands and past bays and headlands.
“Why are you here?” he asked suddenly.
“I just needed to get out of Stockholm for a while.”
Einar turned off the motor and cast his line.
“Just to get out for a while?”
Julius cleared his throat. “My husband left me and I got fired. Both on the same day, within an hour.”
“My hair’s gotten a little too long,” Julius said as they sat on Einar’s terrace later, while Einar grilled the fish he’d caught. “Is there a hairdresser anywhere? I haven’t seen one yet.”
“There’s a barber about 50 kilometers away.”
“I’d rather go to a hairdresser.”
“A hairdresser? No man goes to a hairdresser around here.”
As they were having a beer after dinner, Julius asked, “So what brought you out here to the wilderness?”
Einar took a long sip before answering. “I had a husband, too. And a construction company. In Stockholm.”
“What happened?”
“My husband died in a car accident.”
“Oh! I’m sorry to hear that.”
“I wasn’t able to take care of my company anymore, and it went bankrupt.”
“And then you moved to the wilderness?”
Einar nodded. “The wilderness saved me.”
The next day, as they were working out together in Einar’s garage, Julius asked, “What’s it like being gay here? Are you the only one?”
Einar grinned. “You can find out next week. That’s when we have our Pride.”
“There’s a Pride here?”
“We’ll parade through the community, and then we’ll party on the sports field behind the supermarket.”
A few days later, as they sat in the sauna, which was located in a small cabin right on the lake, Einar said, “I’ve noticed you’re not using hair gel anymore.”
“I ran out and didn’t buy any more. Why should I style my hair out here? When I go swimming, work out, or am in the sauna, the styling gets ruined anyway. So it’s more practical to just let it be.”
“Wouldn’t it make sense, then, to get a short haircut? I don’t mean to offend you, but your hair looks terrible.”
“I’ve actually thought about getting a different haircut. But so far, I haven’t felt like making the trip to the barber.”
“You don’t have to go anywhere. I can rid you of that mop with my clippers.” Einar ran his hand over his stubble. “A buzz cut is the best hairstyle for the wilderness.”
“I don’t know. I’ve never had really short hair.”
The night before Pride, Julius knocked on Einar’s door.
“I’m ready,” Julius said.
“Ready for what?”
Julius took a deep breath. “Can you buzz my hair?”
“Are you sure?”
Julius nodded. “I want to get my hair trimmed short. As short as yours. Not just because it’s more practical, but also to symbolize that my old life is over and something new is about to begin.”
A minute later, Julius was sitting shirtless on a chair in Einar’s kitchen. Einar came out of the bathroom with the clippers. “My usual length is 3 millimeters.”
“3 millimeters sounds about right.”
Einar turned on the clippers and placed them against Julius’s forehead. “Any last words?”
“Just buzz my head! I’m tired of all this hair.”
“It shows. It looks like you haven’t combed it in days.”
Einar began to run the clippers over Julius’s head, and the first strands of hair fell toward the floor.
“The old me would never have imagined I’d get a buzz cut.”
“It’s never too late to get rid of unnecessary baggage.”
Einar quickly mowed strip after strip, and more and more hair landed on the floor.
“What does your new self plan to do? It doesn’t sound like you want to go back to Stockholm.”
“At most, I can imagine going back to Stockholm to clear out the apartment and sell it.”
When only stubble remained on top of Julius’s head, Einar turned to the sides.
“I’d like to settle down here in this area,” Julius continued. “Would it be possible to stay in your cabin until I find a place of my own?”
“It’ll get too cold in the cabin soon. It doesn’t have any heating. But you’re welcome to move into the main house. It’s big enough. I have three bedrooms.”
When Einar had trimmed both sides, he said, “Finally, the world can see your face!”
Julius wanted to get up to look at himself in the mirror, but Einar held him back. “Wait until I’m done, until there isn’t a single long hair left.”
Einar stood behind Julius. With one hand, he pushed Julius’s head down, and with the other, he pressed the clippers against the back of his neck.
“How are you going to make a living?” Einar asked as he moved the clippers up the back of the head.
“I’m considering working remotely as a freelancer. I can build websites and develop apps, and I’ve been working a lot with AI lately. Other than that, I still have my carpentry training.”
Einar stopped shaving. “You have carpentry training?”
“I wasn’t always the yuppie I became later on.”
Einar started shaving again.
“You know, I renovate houses and I regularly need a carpenter, but it’s hard to find someone nearby.”
“Is that supposed to be a job offer? Well, I haven’t worked as a carpenter in ages…”
“The guy I’ve been working with for the last few years is an alcoholic and is becoming less and less reliable. You can’t be any worse than him.”
A few minutes later, Einar turned off the clippers. “All done. The last trace of the Stockholm guy is gone.”
Julius rubbed his head. “Wow! What a feeling!”
He got up to go to the bathroom and looked at himself in the mirror. “I look so different…”
“You look real,” said Einar, leaning against the doorframe.
Julius took his eyes off the mirror. “I guess I need a shower. I’m covered in hair.”
Einar tossed him a towel. “Go take a shower! And then you can help me prepare the pickup for the parade.”
“The pickup will head the parade, serving as the sound truck,” Einar explained as they lifted a speaker onto the cargo bed.
They secured the speaker with straps so it wouldn’t slide back and forth while driving.
Einar wiped the sweat from his forehead with his T-shirt. “We might be doing all this work for nothing. Our DJ backed out, and we might not find a replacement by tomorrow.”
Julius grinned.
“Why are you grinning like that? Do you happen to have any DJ experience?”
“I actually used to DJ when I was in my late 20s, every now and then on the weekends. Mostly deep house.”
“A little deep house would be okay, but could you imagine playing some catchy pop tunes along with it?”
“Sure. I’ve got all kinds of different music on my laptop.”
And so it happened that the next day, Julius ended up DJing at a rural Pride parade. The early autumn sun shone on his face. And when his hands weren’t on the controls, he loved to run them over his extremely short hair.
“You really like your buzzed skull, don’t you?” asked the drag queen who was with him on the pickup.
Julius laughed. Yeah, he liked his buzzed skull! And he liked that he smelled a little like sweat. Both were signs of the unpolished guy he’d become.
He looked down at himself. He was wearing a hoodie he hadn’t washed in weeks and a pair of jeans he’d gotten paint on the previous night while helping Einar paint the banners they’d later taped around the pickup.
In the past, he would never have left the house looking like that. Now he enjoyed being able to just throw on whatever clothes were nearest at hand.
He watched the people behind the truck, smiling happily and dancing to his music. He felt like he’d arrived, like he’d found his place, a new home.
