Christina
This is far from my favorite memory of Aurora. But its still one I cherish deeply.
When it comes to haircut fetishes, they are pretty rare. If you’re reading this I have no doubt you have struggled with finding people who are into it or have found it weird or whatever at some point in your life. Aurora was, just as I am, a transfem. Long hair is so strongly entangled in the image of femininity that it can be terrifying beyond measure for anyone who isn’t a transfem to have their hair cut.
I don’t really remember how things went, but Aurora loved and trusted me enough to let me cut it’s hair. It was my dream to snip off its pony tail. I remember the night when Aurora promised me I could. One of us living in the capital and the other pretty much the middle of nowhere, a place that only ever meant anything during the American occupation(and even then it only really meant anything to the military high command) made things difficult. However long before Aurora promised its ponytail to me, is the memory I wish to share.
It was the last time we met. Or at least my last proper visit. Aurora let me cut its hair that day. So long as it wasn’t anything too extreme. Aurora sat down in the chair, a simple wooden stool. I wrapped my arms around it and thanked it profusely for letting me do this. I don’t remember what we said during it, or what Aurora said to me after I thanked it. But I do remember what I did and what happened afterwards.
I carefully sectioned out Auroras hair into 4 different layers throughout the process. I cut each one a little shorter than the last, staggering slightly it as I went upwards.
Snip Snip went the scissors as more and more hair fell away.
Aurora felt warm to me. When I finished, there was a small pool of its bleached orange-reddish hair around it. Red suited it oh so well. I scooped up a bit of it. A souvenir if you will. I remember auroras warmth as I held its hand as I guided it to the mirror in its room.
“That’s it?” Was all Aurora had to say. “I thought you would have cut more”
All I could do was giggle and hug it as I promised it that it looked a thousand times better. The change wasn’t very noticeable from an outsiders perspective, but to someone who knew Aurora as well as I did the change was as clear as day and it looked fantastic.
The next day when we met at the above ground subway entrance and it taunted me in a little game of tag. I remember seeing how its hair seemed so perfect. throughout the rest of my visit, it seemed to me that Aurora held its head a little bit higher and seemed to flaunt and flick its hair around more.
I still have the section of Auroras hair that I took. I keep it in my desk. Not many people know I have it.
Months after that visit when I was talking about mutual friends about memories of Aurora after it had passed and interactions we had with it that I realized that when Aurora asked if that was all I was going to do, it may have been asking me to do more.
Thinking back on the memory now, the same thought I had when I held Aurora as we looked in the mirror together floods my brain. I was the luckiest girl in the whole wide world to have Aurora as my partner.
Thank you for reading this. Its a memory that I felt needed to be shared. Not locked away in my head till I go on to join Aurora.
