Alyssa’s New Life (Part II)

I walked out of her hair salon in a state of shock. My head felt different and I could sense the lack of hair. What was left of my hair felt lighter and it was almost like someone took a blanket off my head and I was now exposed. At first I felt like people were looking at me but soon realized that most people walking by did not seem to really notice that my hair was so short. I knew deep down that it was just hair and I was the same person, but it would take some time to get used to. I also knew that I was not the first woman to ever have short hair and it was really not such a big deal.

I had almost started to think of things other than my hair when I got into my car. My shock returned when I saw myself in the rearview mirror and felt like I was looking at someone else. My head almost had a different shape and my hair color looked darker. I also noticed that the hair above my ears was just short enough to not show my scalp. I started to get sad looking at myself and tried to tell myself that it is just hair and it will either take time to get used to or grow back. I wanted to think of something else, but just kept staring at myself. I felt a bit childish caring about a haircut so much and almost started crying. I could not get the feeling in my stomach

Ryan was not home when I returned from getting my hair done. I was sort of nervous for when he would see me and was scared that he would hate my hair. I knew that he said he liked the idea of short hair, but was pretty sure this was way shorter than he expected. As I waited for Ryan to come home, I paced around and changed what I was wearing twice, as I wanted to look as good as possible when he first saw me. I wanted to look feminine in spite of my hair but also did not want to look like I was trying so hard. I knew I was overthinking this but I could not help it.

The door eventually opened and Ryan returned home. I was in the kitchen and did not want to just run to the door and look like I was trying to show off my hair so I stayed in the kitchen. He did not come in right away and I was not sure what to do. Ten minutes must have passed until Ryan came into the kitchen and saw me. I was not sure what to expect but was a bit disappointed. He smiled and just said, “your hair looks nice”. I was expecting more than that and did not know what to say. I asked if he thought it was too short and he just said, “well it’s short but you will get used to it”. I asked if he thought I was going to get it cut this short and he said he thought I would probably cut it shorter gradually, but this was fine too. He did not show much enthusiasm in his response.

This may sound childish, but I thought I would get a different reaction from Ryan. He was supportive but did not seem to care very much either way. I wanted to say more about my hair but felt silly so I decided I would not bring it up again until he said something. We had dinner at home and it was just like any other meal. I kept thinking he would bring up my hair and kept wanting to mention it, but stuck to what I decided and did not talk about it. I felt like he barely noticed that my hair was now shorter than his. We often talk about our days and I figured he would ask about my haircut and how it went. Maybe he thought I would bring it up if I wanted to talk about it.

I suppose I was annoyed and went up to bed early hoping that he would follow me and show me how he felt. We were still newly married so the physical side was exciting and new for both of us. In my head I planned out that I was going to surprise him with things that he liked in bed that I did not usually do. I will avoid details about this, but can say my hair would no longer be in the way. He came up to our room and just said he would come to bed later and did not say much more. I went to bed upset but also knew I was overthinking all of this and being too sensitive.

The next morning I woke up at my usual time. I use the bathroom and get ready after Ryan as he has to be at work early.  I prefer having the bathroom to myself, but marriage is sometimes about sharing. I followed my regular routine. I had a bit of a shock when I first looked in the mirror and saw myself with such short hair. I realized that this would take some time to get used to. My hair on top in the back was sticking up a little with a cowlick. The sides and back were exactly the same as there was not enough length to mess up or even move for that matter.

The reality of short hair really hit me when I showered. I always wash and condition my hair first and then soap myself. I followed my normal routine, but used a bit less shampoo than usual. When I put the shampoo in my hair I realized that I probably used enough shampoo for 10 washes. My hair was washed in well under a minute. As I washed and rinsed it I felt my hair on the sides and back and still could not believe how short it was. It was like it barely needed shampoo and did not make a lather. As I washed the rest of my body, I realized that I now had more length with hair down below than I did on with the hair on the sides and back of my head. My shower ended much faster than usual.

I got out and towel dried my body and hair. I felt like my hair was almost dry by that point. It felt weird towel drying what was around a 1/4 inch of hair on the sides and back. I usually blow dry my hair and straighten my hair with a brush, but now it was almost dry already and my hair on top was straight. My hair on the sides and back of my head was not long enough to need anything. I put a bit of styling gel on the hair on top and pushed it down with my hands. I went to get my brush and realized that I did not even need it. My hair was done and already dry in under 2 minutes. I do not wear makeup usually but put on a little as I was self conscious of looking boyish. I am not skinny and have a womanly looking face, so I still looked female thankfully. I was out of the bathroom 25 minutes before I normally get out.

Ryan was still home when he saw me get out of the bathroom and commented on how fast I was getting ready. I said it helps when you don’t have any hair to deal with. He smiled and said that I still have hair and it is just shorter. I said that it was much shorter and Ryan agreed and said that it is probably why I was out of the bathroom a half hour earlier. He then asked if I was happy that I cut it. I told him I was still getting used to it and it felt really short. He said I will probably need to just get used to it and I could always grow it out if I prefer it longer. It made me feel good that he said that and I asked if he thought I should grow it. He said he liked it on me and really cared about a lot of other things about me more than my hair. I was not sure how to take that.

That night we went up to bed at the same time and were together. I did what I had planned for the night before and, as expected, my hair did not get in the way. I do not want to get into details about what took place in our bedroom, but he did seem to keep his hand on my nape. He was playing with my hair after and made the comment how he liked how it felt almost prickly on the sides and back. I did not know what to say, but it was the first time I felt pretty since my hair was cut.

I guess I got more comfortable with my hair over the next few days. I started setting my alarm so I woke up 30 minutes later. I also started to feel like I was looking at myself when I looked in the mirror. We went over to Ryan’s parents place for dinner that Sunday and I felt nervous getting ready. Even if I tried I could not spend time on my hair, but I did put on some make up. I asked Ryan how I looked and he was supportive like usual, even if he showed limited enthusiasm.

When we arrived, Ryan’s mom immediately complimented my hair and was super supportive. I could tell she really liked it and said it suited me well. I joked that I thought she would be surprised to see my hair shorter than hers and she said I was made for really short hair. Even if I might not have agreed, this made me feel good. Kelly arrived a bit later and already knew that I was getting my hair cut. She was surprised that I went this short and said that she thought I would chicken out and just get a bob. She was shocked at how short it was and Ryan’s brother also said he liked it.

After dinner it was just Ryan’s mom and Kelly and Kelly asked if I was happy with my hair this short. I said it was a bit of a shock how short it was cut but I was getting used to it. Kelly asked why I decided to go so short and I explained what I told Claire and that she just did this. Kelly told me I was brave and could have ended up with even shorter hair based on what I told Claire to do. I really could not understand how my hair could have been much shorter. I mentioned how fast it was to do my hair now and Ryan’s mom said that is the benefit with really short hair. She mentioned that if I like it this easy, it means regular cuts to keep it neat and maintain my new look.

I was somewhat taken aback when Ryan’s mom just assumed that this was my new look. I mean I was not sure if I would keep my hair short, let alone this short. She also told me she thought having my hair like this would be great for me finding work and it gave me a more mature and serious look. Kelly also agreed. I really had not given that much thought before and sort of assumed that my hair would not be all that relevant to my job search, so long as it was not a crazy color or an offensive style. I was not too concerned with having my hair a certain way for work and cared more about how I thought it looked and also Ryan’s opinion.

I expected finding a good job to be a challenge, but I got lucky. My degree was in financial accounting and I looked for work in that area. My first interview was for a larger manufacturing company that was located about 45 minutes from where we lived. The position was for an accounting manager who reported directly to the comptroller of the company who then reported to the CFO. It was a job that had three bookkeepers under it so I assumed I did not have a chance to get the job at my level. I had three separate interviews and to my surprise I was offered the position. I was shocked when I learned my starting salary and expected considerably less.

Ryan was happy that I got the job and could not believe what I was getting paid. I was happy to share the good news with others but did not share the salary issue. The job was a long drive from where we lived, so it meant me getting up earlier. This sort of disrupted my morning routine. I realized I would have to get into the bathroom before Ryan and tried to make it work. I do not think he was thrilled but was fine so long as his routine still worked and he could get to work on time. I was glad my hair was so easy to deal with at that time as spending more time in there would mean having to get up earlier.  As my hair grew a bit it might have added a few minutes to style and dry it, but it was still way faster than before.

I went shopping for new clothes for work and Ryan helped me pick out some of my new business clothes. I tried to maintain a professional and older look. It was fun and I was glad to have him with me. After we were home from shopping I tried on some of the new outfits for Ryan. He was supportive and seemed to like watching me change in front of him. Ryan asked if I had planned to get my hair cut before starting work. I had not even thought of that. I was not sure if I was even going to cut it again. It had now been about 6 weeks since I cut it so the back and sides had grown in quite a lot and felt very different. When my hair was longer, 6 weeks was not much but with my hair this short, the hair on sides and back of my head was now probably three times as long as it was when I first had it cut. It went from feeling prickly, to furry to now having a little length. I sort of liked having some more length and felt like it looked softer. The hair on top had also grown a little longer and did not have the same shape.

When Ryan brought it up, I said I was not sure and was still undecided on whether I would keep it short. I asked what he thought and he said it was up to me. I said that if I was keeping it short, it was probably time to tidy it up. I knew I did not want it as short as last time. Even this length seemed short on top and felt like I needed to grow it a little more. I decided I would just get it trimmed and let the length grow out on top. I was going to ask Ryan’s opinion on what I should do, but decided I already had my mind made up so why ask. The first official day at my job was on Monday so she returned to Claires on Saturday.

Claire was thrilled to see me. She seemed a bit surprised. I asked why she seemed surprised and she told me Kelly was in for her regular appointment (color, cut and highlights) and told her I was growing my hair out so she did not expect to see me for a while. I said I thought I needed a trim but wanted to leave some length on top. I told her to just trim my hair on the sides and nape leaving more length. We also talked about my job and how my hair gave me a mature look. She said that was great and said she loves longer hair too. We talked about the things I liked and didn’t like about short hair. In addition to being super easy, I said I also liked how it made my neck look longer. Claire agreed and warned me that if I want super easy, it means very short. I told her I could spend a little more time on it in the morning but did not want to go back to what I used to do. Claire also mentioned that many of her clients have her take the hairline higher to elongate the neck. I told Claire to try that but leave me more length on top.

At first I freaked out as Claire took out her clippers and started using them on my nape and sides. She left a longer guard on the clippers so it was still close to the same length I came in with but she evened it out. I thought she was just clipping all my hair off like last time and thought she was taking it just as short. Only after she was done did I realize that I still had hair. Claire saw I was in shock and explained that clippers can have longer guards and leave more length. She said she finds clippers much faster and better if you want your hair even. She barely cut my hair on top but shaped it and gave it more style. When she was almost done she began clipping my neckline and asked if I wanted it taken up a bit. I said why not but only a little. Claire’s version of a little was higher than mine, but I liked how it turned out.

Claire did a great job at shaping my hair. She blew it out and it sort of had more style to it, I walked out and felt like I liked my hair better now than before I walked in.

To be continued…

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