According to Mary, she followed me to the train station barber out of concern. Her best friend with the long beautiful hair suddenly getting an unflattering mom haircut and not growing it out even after a year?
(That was at the direction of the barber. If I was to cover his beautiful work, then I couldn’t pretend to be a woman with long beautiful hair. Any wigs would have to be short and dowdy.)
She originally stayed a safe distance away as she followed me, but, once I sat down for my weekly headshave, she drew closer and closer until I finally saw her. Her face wasn’t at all judgemental – it was more curious. So, I had an idea.
To the barber, I said, “This is my friend Mary. She’s being nosy. I think that she needs to be punished.”
He agreed. When he uncaped me, he told Mary to sit down, which she did. I took out my phone and started filming. He picked out her halo of auburn curls for a bit. Then he got the clippers. She looked sick as he ran them over his scalp. But she didn’t object. In fact, she started to moan as her curls piled up.
“Another puta,” said the barber, wrapping her head in a warm towel.
Once he shaved her smooth with his straight razor, I got a red Sharpie from my purse. He allowed me to draw a target on Mary’s freshly shaved scalp, which made him laugh. Then we all went to his backroom together.
After we finished, leaving the barber a huge tip, I took Mary home and cleaned her up, carefully scrubbing off the target that we drew on. Then I explained the rules. She would now be joining me on my weekly visits, or I would leak the footage.
She smiled.
