This is not me

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Disclaimer: my natural language is not English so it can be a bit confusing
If you have suggestions please leave them in the comments, it would help me a lot

Cherry holds a bouquet as she waits for her girlfriend to leave the Cronos facility after going on a mission last week. She would have liked to go with her, but her chlorokinesis powers would have been useless in a desert. But tonight she could welcome her girlfriend and spoil her all night after a successful mission.
Finally, she saw Kate run out of the facility and jump into her arms. Cherry picks her up and spins her around happily, in her excitement she didn’t notice that her girlfriend didn’t look the same as she did when she left.
“I missed you so much!” Kate said as she gave her multiple kisses.
“I missed you too, little Goldilocks,” she pulls her down and hands her the bouquet as she runs a hand through her hair.

And then she realized.

Her long locks were gone!

Kate’s waist-length curly blonde hair was now a pixie, the top was longer than the back and sides and she had bangs that honestly looked adorable on her, but it was still a pretty drastic change. it made it hard to recognize her.
-Your hair!- she gasps as she spins around to see it from every perspective- I can’t believe you cut it!
-Yes, I know, it’s short, but it’ll grow back”- she says, trying to play it down.
-It’s still a drastic change but you look great honey, but why did you cut it?” she asks hesitantly because Kate had never cut it before. Since she was a little girl she had long curls hanging down her back plus she was working, when could she cut it?
-Something happened on the mission and I had to do it, it doesn’t matter, we better go home, I want to eat your delicious pasta with meatballs,” she gives her a little kiss as she walks to the car. Cherry could feel that Kate didn’t want to talk about it and even saw her a little uncomfortable about her question, so she preferred not to say anything and walk with her to the car.

Kate tells her about her mission as they head home, every now and then Cherry can see how Kate brings a hand to her neck wanting to touch her hair like she used to only to remove her hand. quickly as she touches the skin on her neck.

-Wow babe I’m surprised you’re not wrapped in bandages and that you didn’t burn Kiren for his jokes- she laughs and jokes knowing how little patience her girlfriend can have.
“Well, I thought about it, but a giant green bug showed up before I could do it, I hated that thing, that’s why I had to cut my hair”- Kate falls silent and bites her lip at the mention of something she didn’t want to. mention.
-Wait what, what does that bug have to do with you getting a haircut?
“The story is sillier than it sounds”- Kate sighs as she can’t ignore the subject and tells him what happened.

…………………………………last night………………………………………..

I was with the rest of the team looking for the ruins and the girl who got lost when a giant bug appeared in front of us and started throwing a green slime at us that turned out to be a toxic acid.
Mind you, we defended ourselves and attacked it while dodging that slime, when the bug was about to disappear it throws a big ball of toxic slime at me and at the last moment I dodge it without it touching a single part of me or at least that’s what I thought.

-Ummmmm Kate doesn’t get angry but ….- said Kiran a little worried.
-But what? and what is that smell?” I said while I smelled something burning near us.
-It’s your hair…..- He said while he carefully grabbed my ponytail and showed me how the green slime-covered a big part of it and melted it because it was so toxic and corrosive.
-You’ve got to be kidding me! I growled as I looked at my hair, I felt my heart pounding harder as I watched my hair melt away-how did he manage this?
-I’m sorry Kate but this is hopeless, I’ve read about this and the slime will keep burning your hair until it reaches the scalp and it will still dry moving…… if we want to stop it we have to cut your hair.
-oh great…-I sigh while a knot forms in my stomach when I hear the idea of cutting my beautiful hair….. wait but what? god Kate that toxic slime can get to your skull and you’re worried about cutting your hair? don’t be silly- well if it’s the only way it’s ok, cut it.
-Great, I’d ask you if you’re ready but if I don’t do it now this is going to go fast,” he says and I watch as he pulls out his knife.
I stand still and feel him grab my ponytail, then I feel some tugging and hear the knife cut my golden curls.
-Do you mind not pulling too much please?”
-Sorry sorry- he apologizes and tries to pull less. Kiran drops a few strands in front of me and that’s when I felt as if my heart stopped and breathing became more difficult. Even though a part of them had already melted and was difficult to guess the length, the locks could be almost 10 inches long and they were still melting too fast…..I was losing more than 10 inches of hair thanks to that stupid bug and I couldn’t do anything about it anymore. I was in shock.
Kiran kept throwing long locks into the sand, one by one, they fell lifeless and melted in seconds until only small burnt remnants remained.
The lump in my stomach went to my throat and my head kept spinning and filled with questions. How short was my hair going to be after this? how bad would it look? when could I get my long hair back? was I going to have to live with choppy, messy hair until I got back from the mission?
I had to make a great effort to keep my composure and regain control. Come on Kate it’s just hair, it’s not an arm or any vital organ, it will grow back, don’t make a big deal out of it. You never gave so much importance to your hair so why do you worry? It doesn’t define you, you can live with short hair and you might even like it.

I touched my neck looking for at least a small strand but there was nothing. I moved my hand up until I felt the tips of what was left of my long curls just above my chin. The curly hair that touched my hips went to touch my cheeks in less than 5 minutes. I felt the lump in my throat again and some tears fell down my cheeks but I reconsidered and wiped them away without anyone noticing. She was a powerful fire sorceress, not a crying little girl who had all the confidence in her hair.
-I’m sorry it’s so short but the toxic slime didn’t allow me to save anymore. But for the record, I think you look great -he said and then put a hand on my shoulder.
Don’t worry, it will grow back. The important thing is that I don’t have my scalp and skull burning right now.- I smiled at him to show that I’m okay and then we continued on our way.
I spend the rest of the mission worrying and nagging myself internally. Thoughts about my hair seemed constant. How bad does it look? What if I look like a boy? If I look like a boy now I can’t imagine what I’ll look like when I fix it, god what will Cherry think? But I soon reminded myself that it’s silly to think about it. I was on an important mission, I was a great agent and I couldn’t be distracted by a simple thing like a haircut. I had to stay professional and so I did the rest of the mission


-I’m sorry that happened honey but Kiran is right, you look great she says encouraging her a little as parks the car in front of her house and they both get out to go into her house.
-Thanks honey but it’s nothing, completing that mission is the star of this- she smiles and she enters the house. She puts her things aside and then lay down on the sofa exhausted.
-Well yes it is and you look very tired but here I am to serve you like a queen- Cherry approaches her to kiss her and then goes to the kitchen to prepare dinner.

While cooking, Cherry can see how Kate shyly felt her hair as if trying to feel her long curls again, then she shakes her head and gets distracted by her cell phone. As much as she wouldn’t admit it, she knew this was shocking to her, and with good reason, for Kate, it was shocking the first time she cut her hair that took her years to grow and it was at will, she can’t imagine how it feels to have to cut it due to an accident at work. As long as she’s known Cherry, she’s never had her hair cut short, she always had a perfect curly mane that bounced when she walked, shined like gold, and was envied by other girls. She hadn’t shown a dislike for short hair either and she even used to say that she Wouldn’t mind cutting her hair, that her hair wasn’t that important to her but of course was a lie. Kate loves her hair more than she admits, she took her time every morning to fix her hair and she also did it at night, she read the ingredients of her hair products one by one making sure it had nothing that could damage her beautiful curls and she trimmed the split ends every two months without fail. Her hair was her pride and she adored receiving compliments on it and hearing how perfect it was, now without it, she must feel incomplete and less than perfect, instead of adoring and waiting for comments from others she must be insecure and want nobody to even mention her new hair. If only she knew how amazing she looks.

Her face is now exposed letting everyone see her beautiful features. Well-shaped cheekbones, large and bright blue eyes that stood out even more from her with her bangs, eyebrows that frame her gaze giving her a sensual and daring air, thick lips but with a delicate appearance, a small and perfect nose. Her small, flat ears were now on display and her neck looked longer and more graceful. She looked more beautiful than she ever had and no one could deny it.

Cherry walks over to Kate who is still on her phone, she crouches down next to her and runs her hand through her girlfriend’s pixie hair as she used to when it was still long. Kate, who hadn’t felt Cherry approaching, is surprised at the touch and turns to see a thoughtful Cherry.-it will grow back don’t worry
-I know, it’s what hair does- giggles
-Well then why are you so thoughtful? it is not something usual in you.
-I’m just surprised at how good a job Kiran did with a knife and being in the desert.
-Nah he did a lousy job but good considering the circumstances
-So? but it doesn’t look like it, it looks like you went to a salon.
-Well I didn’t but had helped to fix that mess


Upon completing the mission in the desert of India, we went to the lodge where we stayed on the first day of the mission and before leaving for the desert. I was packing up so I could go home when Lizzie, a co-worker, and friend, walks into the room.
-Everything is almost ready to go, do you need help?-She ​​tells me as she lifts some boxes with the equipment we occupy
-No thanks, I’m almost done- I answer them and continue packing.
-Well if you’re sure……have you thought about this?-She ​​approaches me and touches a short strand that hung above my cheek
-I’ll fix it when I’m home, there’s no time for that now- I turn my back and carry the box I was occupying with the others, I didn’t want to talk about my hair anymore but the universe insisted on reminding me
-You should not have to wait so long, we still have time before we leave and I could fix it for you
-Thank you but you don’t have to, besides there are still many more important things to do.
-As I said, almost everything is ready, if we do it together we finish faster, and you can’t walk with your hair like this until you get home, it’s a long time. Come on let me help you, my mother was a hairdresser and she taught me some things I know what to do- she smiles at me knowing she’s right, I couldn’t walk with my hair like that all the way home, it was ridiculous and even if Lizzie didn’t know what to do there was no way it could look worse than already looks, there was nothing to lose and at least she could look decent until she returned home and see how she recovered her precious long hair.
-well okay I agree, help me with this mess please- I say and she immediately nods and goes to get the things we’ll need.

Five minutes before I was sitting in a chair with paper around the floor, a towel on my shoulders, I had wet my hair in the bathroom sink and Lizzie was combing it. I know my hair will get shorter but sadly there was nothing I could do just keep calm and let her do what needs to do.-You’re lucky, you have the face to rock any style – say as take the scissors, my heart beat faster again but I remember myself keep calm and be the adult I suppose am
-Thank you but will look decent is enough to me right now
-Well you’ll look more than decent I’m sure- smile confidently and then lean my head so my chin touches my chest, I feel how to comb my hair and place the scissors on my neck touching it making me feel nervous. And there’s when I hear the scissors close.

I thought my hair was already short but I was wrong. The hair that was falling to the papers on the floor was longer than I expected, like 4 inches of hair. As in the desert, I feel a knot form in my throat as feel the scissors close to my scalp and see the hair falling on me and then on the floor.

Lizzie talks to me while she works but I don’t pay attention to her, my attention was on the scissors whose I could hear very close to my ears, the air from the room’s fan that the shorter my hair is the more I feel it on my head and of course the pile of hair that forms on the floor, I can’t believe how much hair I had even when my hair was already short and the pile was just getting bigger. At this point I know I was going to have a pixie cut, the idea of having such a short haircut worries me to the point to fight to keep a normal breath to not let Lizzie find out how nervous I was.

Questions fill my head again. How will I look? will still look like me or will look like another girl? what if I don’t look like a girl but like a boy? what would I say when someone asks me why I got a haircut? My family won’t believe I wanted to do it and neither would Cherry… Oh fuck Cherry! she’ll hate this, she’ll be mad and sad when she sees me. Cherry loves my hair, played with it all the time, rubs it at night, and helps me to take care of it, oh no no what would I do now? a wig won’t be the same and is hard work with one and I can’t use hair extension with my hair this short, ugh stupid bug and stupid me for not avoiding his attack.
Cmon Kate relax, you’re acting like a silly girl, Cherry would be more worried for you than for your hair as you should be, Heck girl you burn a whole build on your own this is nothing you won’t die because you cut your hair just breath and try to be an adult.
I calm down as I feel something on my forehead that makes me pay attention to what’s happening. Lizzie has combed a section of hair in front of me and cut it just above my eyebrows, she was giving me bangs?!

-Are you giving me bangs?- I ask trying to not sound worried, for me bangs are mostly for kids 
-Yes you agree to this remember? I ask you a few minutes ago- she looks me confused, oh heck I wasn’t paying attention when she asked
-Yes I know but I didn’t think you really would do it
-Well I did it, relax you are looking amazing and I’m not done yet- she hasn’t finished? There was enough hair on the floor to make a carpet, what else does she need to do?

My fear grew when I hear a strong sound like a roar. When I look to Lizzie I see she’s holding something……wait……..n-no way…….she’s holding clippers?! where the hell did she get clippers and why she will use them?!
-Lizzie…..first how do you have clippers here and second why need clippers?-I say, even though I tried not to sound nervous Lizzie noticed I was nervous when she gave me a smile and put a hand on my shoulder. Ugh no I didn’t want this, now she sure sees me like a scared crying girl, not a strong fire girl.
-First I got the clippers for my mom in a market near here, you know she’s a hairdresser and I like to get things for her when i can, and second, it’s just to clean up the neck a little. Since your hair is so short now, your neck will look scruffy so I need to use them but hey relax I know what I’m doing”- “your hair is so short” is that line stuck in my mind as the knot in my throat get bigger. Oh my, my poor hair is gone…..the long mane I had for years was now a short hair like a guy and there’s nothing I can do to change that.
I was going to lose my mind again when Lizzie hold my head down and then I feel something cold on my neck that almost make me shiver but I kept still if I move I lose more hair than I already lost and there was no way that will happen. The clipper’s sound changed when start cutting and they vibrate on my neck giving me a weird but, thanks to god, not a horrible feeling. Lizzie moved the clippers on my neck as small hairs fall on me. Oh please god finish this now.
Luckily for me, she didn’t cut much hair. After a few minutes, she leaves the clippers and hands me the phone camera to see, and I frost once again.

-what do you think?- she asked me but I didn’t know what to say……I couldn’t believe what I was seeing…..I couldn’t recognize the girl I was looking for but definitely, she wasn’t me… she wasn’t Kate the rapunzel girl in school, the goldilocks as Cherry calls her, the girl whose hair fits her perfect style and for what works hard to keep it perfectly bright and healthy. that The girl in the camera was a girl with a pixie haircut, with the sides and the back shorts, not too much to see the scalp but short and the top longer with bangs above eyebrows but even that is still the shorter in my life. It doesn’t look bad, my ears are small and don’t look ugly and my eyes look more big and bright, but even so, that’s not me, I look like a stranger.
-Looks great Lizzie- I said and smile much as I can, of course, I won’t tell her what I actually think- you did it amazing Lizzie thanks
-See I told you I knew what to do, I dare to say that bug make you a favor throwing that slime on your hair, you look more beautiful than you already were -she hugs me with a big smile on her face, least one of us was happy

We clean the room and throw the hair in the trash, I feel tears run on my face one more time and I swipe them without Lizzie noticing it. We got all ready and leave the place to come back home. Is not necessary to say that the team was surprised about my hair and so were many co-workers when we arrive at the facility. I ignored them as just could think about how Cherry would react when seeing me in a few minutes outside the building.


 They finish dinner and wash the dishes together, Cherry couldn’t stop looking at her girlfriend and her new look while Kate just wanted no one else to notice her hair until it grows back.
-I have heard what others told you about your hair but I haven’t heard what you think about it- Cherry asks putting the plate son their places
-Is okay, is just hair after all is not that important- says Kate trying to play it down again
-Cmon you know that’s a lie, babe is ok if you don’t want to tell your opinion to others but can tell me
– I don’t have anything else to say, is it a cute haircut what else should I say?- walks to their room hoping Cherry doesn’t do not keep insisting
-Well maybe beautiful instead of cute, that you love it or hate it, how you feel, if want keep it or let it grow, you know things people usually say- Kate follows her trying she stop pretending is fine
-I don’t hate it, feel good, and will let it grow, are you happy now?
-I’ll be happy when you’re honest, why are trying to hide your feelings?
-Because they make feel stupid!- she covers her mouth after admitting it and stays standing in front of Kate
-oh honey, but why? Having those feelings is something normal- hold her hands and sit on the bed asking her to do the same
-Is not normal to me, I have never felt this worried about my hair I thought I wouldn’t feel anything the day I cut it but now I don’t stop thinking about it like it is the biggest problem in the world- she sits next to Kate and hugs her, tears run through her cheeks and this time doesn’t wipe them so Kate doesn’t see them- I should be happy for being alive and complete the mission but instead, I just think I would have my long hair with me if I had been faster, I would still be a perfectly beautiful girl.
-Yes it’s true, you are not a perfectly beautiful girl-Kate look at her confusing and could say hurt- you are a goddess, this hair makes you look ten times better than your old long hair I swear it, I know is hard to get used to it and shocked had the hair you let grow all your life and make you feel perfect cut it this short but I promise in few days or weeks you’ll love this and who knows maybe even won’t want have long hair again
-I-i’m not sure about that, I don’t hate my hair but I feel so weird and nothing like me, and you won’t play with my curls anymore.
-That’s not a problem, I can run my hand through it and rub your back, you’ll see that feels amazing. About how you feel, I felt the same the first time I cut my hair remember?
-Yes, you tried to hide it the first days and though it was a mistake
-And what did you say to me?-she smiles, rubbing the back of her neck.
-I told you that if you don’t give it a chance you won’t know if it was a mistake- she shivers as she feels Kate’s hand on her back.
-Exactly, and I believed you and gave it a chance and was more than happy with my short hair and so will you
-Well…….. I guess I don’t lose anything trying – Cherry smiles a little, feeling better with Kate’s support.
-That’s my girl- she kisses her lovingly and deeply and then lies down for a magical evening.

And as Kate said, Cherry got used to her hair and loved it as much as her long curls. Now they both try different hairstyles all the time, long or short, blonde or black, curly or straight, it doesn’t matter, they do it together and they are happily



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